Be_So_You on LTK

Tuesday night’s graduation dinner outfit. It’s amazing how hard it becomes to find dresses with sleeves as summer progresses.
Since my body often feels soft, I’m always looking for dresses that have structure, and this striped shirtdress has just that with its vertical buttons and stripes that draw the eye up and down, the open collar that draws the eye to the face, and the waist tie that cinches the waist.
I’m wearing a small. Medium was too big for my 36B bust.

#LTKMidsize #LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert

Tuesday night’s graduation dinner outfit. It’s amazing how hard it becomes to find dresses with sleeves as summer progresses. Since my body often feels soft, I’m always looking for dresses that have structure, and this striped shirtdress has just that with its vertical buttons and stripes that draw the eye up and down, the open collar that draws the eye to the face, and the waist tie that cinches the waist. I’m wearing a small. Medium was too big for my 36B bust. LTKMidsize LTKOver40 LTKSaleAlert

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Today’s errands outfit for a cold and rainy spring day. I wear this T-shirt in a size small and a size down in these LOFT jeans. This bag and jacket are old, similar options are linked.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

Amazon top: I sized up to a Medium but may be able to wear a small. These jeans fit tts.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I built this summer capsule wardrobe around the real summer-dressing challenges shared with me in my Story polls, from wanting more arm coverage to pull-on pants you can wear instead of shorts, comfy shorts, and easy tops that work with a soft belly.⁠
I’ll be sharing styling ideas for these pieces next week…
Fit notes:
⁠
-Quince Collared Linen Popover Shirt⁠
Fits true to size. I’m in a medium.⁠
⁠
-Amazon Batwing Short Sleeve Sweater⁠
Fits true to the sizing chart. I’m in a small.⁠
⁠
-J.Crew Factory Essential Crewneck Tee⁠
Fits true to size with a close fit. Size up for a roomier fit.⁠
Thicker smoothing material. ⁠
⁠
-Amazon Banded Hem White V Neck Tee⁠
Fits true to size. I'm in a Small⁠
⁠
-Amazon Cotton Linen Palazzo Pants (70% cotton, 30% linen)⁠
Fits true to size with an elastic drawstring waist. No shrinkage after cold wash + lay flat to dry. I sized up to L. ⁠
⁠
-Quince Linen Wide Leg Pants (Flax)⁠
Fit true to the sizing chart. I’m wearing a medium and 28” inseam⁠ (no shrinking or stretching)
⁠
-Gap Drawstring Waist 6” Linen Blend Shorts (Blue Stripe)⁠
Fit true to the sizing chart. I’m in a medium. 12” rise, 6” inseam.⁠
⁠
-Old Navy High Rise Baggy Jean Shorts⁠
I sized up one for a looser fit. 12.5” rise, 5” inseam.⁠
⁠
-LOFT Mini Dress⁠
Fits true to size. I’m in a medium. ⁠
⁠
-Banana Republic Factory Striped Poplin Utility Midi Shirtdress⁠
I'm in a Small. Medium was too big in the bust at 36B. ⁠
⁠
-Quince Denim Utility Jacket⁠
Fits true to the sizing chart. I’m in a medium.⁠

I’m wearing J.Crew Factory wide leg cropped jeans (tts) and this Amazon tee in a medium (I sized up but could probably wear a small).
⁠
📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans. ⁠

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I own this dress in two colors, black and this creamy heathered oatmeal color.
It’s made from LOFT’s Scubasoft material, which is smoothing and medium weight, and it has pockets. I like how this dress has an elastic waist for definition and classic short sleeves. And it works for my 36B bust and size 10 bottom half, which is tricky to do in a dress. I wear a medium and it fits true to size. Wear this to the ballfield, a casual lunch, or out running errands.

This banded hem tee fits true to size. I’m in a Small. These shorts are made of a linen blend fabric and have a relaxed fit with a 6” inseam, so they’re not too short and not too long.
The leg is looser, which always makes my thighs feel smaller in comparison, which I love. They have a 12” rise and I wear a medium, true to the sizing chart.
The elastic drawstring waist is comfortable. They don’t shrink when washed and dried on a delicate cycle.
I got these on sale for 50% off. Definitely wait for a sale.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

A banded hem top is another style that’s easy to wear untucked. This one has a boatneck and elbow length batwing sleeves to cover the backs of the arms. It’s a lightweight sweater material with a visible weave for texture.
It comes in multiple colors. I wear a size small and it fits true to the recommended size in the sizing chart.
I sized up in these baggy jean shorts for a looser fit. They’re so comfy.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

I’m always looking for alternatives to a simple white tee that are just as easy to wear but make an outfit pop. I chose this one because it has classic short sleeves for upper arm coverage, and you can leave it untucked to cover a midsection.
I’m wearing a size medium, my true size. I washed it on a cold delicate cycle and tumble dried low, and there was no shrinkage.
For the pants, the wide waistband gives waist definition, and multiple comments mention how flattering and smoothing it is for a soft belly. These have no pocket show through and short back pockets that easily lay flat. They stretch minimally with wear and don’t shrink when washed. I do recommend running an iron over them so they look crisp and wearing nude underwear. My navy underwear definitely shows through.
They fit true to the sizing chart. I’m wearing the 28”, which works with flat shoes at 5’6”, and I’m in my usual medium.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

I love these pants. They’re lightweight (70% cotton and 30% linen), the perfect length with flats at 5’6”, and tummy friendly with an elastic drawstring waist.
After reading comments about shrinkage with washing, I washed them on a short cold delicate cycle, smoothed the waist, legs, and hem, then laid them flat to dry. I’m happy to report no shrinkage. And no ironing necessary, I didn’t iron these at all after washing so you can see how low-wrinkling they are.
These pants have front pockets (none on the back), and aren’t see through or scratchy. They come in so many different colors.
I’m in a large. Medium were a little tight in the rear as a curvy size 10.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

I’ve noticed a trend where midsize women are posing in their underwear to show their shape. I’m just not psychologically prepared to do that, so my whites will have to do so you can see what’s really going on with my body under the clothes.

When you’re rebuilding a closet after weight gain, you just want to find jeans that fit.

I’m 5'6", wear a size 10, and have always carried weight in my thighs, and butt. The belly came in perimenopause with a 15 lb weigh gain. When I first started looking for new jeans, I tried over 15 pairs to find one that worked. I know the time and frustration that come with the search, and I’ll do anything I can to save you some of that trial-and-error.

You may notice that 4 of these jean styles are from J.Crew Factory.

In the past, I believed their jeans wouldn’t work for me. So imagine my surprise that my closet is now full of them. I’ve probably purchased more than 30 jeans from them.

The road to finding jeans that fit after your body changes isn’t easy, so I hope this list gives you some solid options.

This linen shirt is from Quince and fits true to size, I’m in a medium.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

Styling can completely change how you look in a pair of jeans. If you bring home a new pair that actually fits, it may take some trial and error to figure out the best way to wear them.

These pictures are from 2023. I was so excited these jeans actually fit… but when I got them home, they looked awful.

The right styling made the difference.

Since these have a very high rise that accentuates the belly, the best top is an untucked hip-length one that cuts the belly in half. A puff sleeve, a v-neck cardigan, and a blazer draw the eye higher up on the body and away from the belly.

Lessons learned that guided my future jeans shopping: I’m short-waisted and a higher rise jean is harder for me to just throw on with a tee and go. In the dressing room, I’ll notice where the waistband hits in relation to my belly button and look for waistbands that hit lower in the future (like an inch below the belly button).

I have a round up of short-sleeve tummy-friendly tops coming, so stay tuned.

👉️ Was this post helpful? Leave a comment below and let me know. Save this post for when you need some styling inspiration.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Memorial Day weekend is coming and if you’re using a free day to tackle your closet, consider this your permission slip…

You do not have to keep clothes that trigger shame every time you get dressed.

You do not have to see them every morning.

And moving them out of your everyday closet is not giving up.

Sometimes it’s the first step toward emotional relief and making space to figure out what actually works for the body you have now.

Bag them up and move them to the basement or guest room if you need to.

You do not have to decide forever today. ❤️

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Easy errands outfit from last week. Wearing those Madewell jeans again, I sized up. I also sized up in this elbow sleeve tee to a large. In a small in this jacket.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

My twin nephews are graduating from college this weekend. One is at Virginia Tech where Adam and I both went, and the other is at UVA (where we live). We’re attending both graduation ceremonies, so we’ll be driving between schools.

Seeing younger generations up close always makes me curious about how all of us think about aging, style, visibility, and evolving.

I’d love to know:

Has your relationship with getting dressed changed as you’ve gotten older? If so, how?

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

This top came home with me today, it’s so cute and the perfect brown-copper color. It runs wide, I ended up sizing down to an XS. It’s 24” long rather than the 21” that so many tops are these days. It’s on sale for $25.

99% of the time when I’m wearing shorts, I’m also throwing on a denim utility jacket because I get cold in air conditioning.

Since the tee has a relaxed fit and drop sleeves, and the shorts are relaxed too, I like the structure the jacket adds to the outfit. The lapels, shoulder shape, and vertical lines help balance all the softness.

You may notice I tucked the tee in under the jacket here, but you could also leave it untucked.

Gotta love these autogenerated captions…they’re good for a chuckle today. Yes, I do stay away from oversized teeth.

@oldnavy tee relaxed fit, I’m in my true size small
@gap shorts, fits tts, in a medium
@onequince denim utility jacket fits tts, I’m in a medium
@toms platform sandals with Velcro ankle strap super cushioned (gifted)

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

I had a request to show a side by side comparison of a V-neck tee versus a crewneck tee for those of you trying to decide which neckline you like best on yourself.

A V-neck creates a longer vertical line and is traditionally considered more slimming because it draws the eye up and down.

If you’re fuller through the bust or upper body, a V-neck can create a longer, leaner visual effect.

A crewneck gives a little more visual presence to the upper body, so if you’re smaller up top, it’s a great option. Styled with layered necklaces, it can also feel a bit more current.

Neither is right or wrong. They just create a slightly different effect and vibe.

Personally, I find myself reaching for crewnecks more these days because I’m smaller through my upper body than my lower half, so I like the balancing effect a crewneck creates with my larger bottom half. My eye is also craving that fresher style, especially paired with some blingy necklaces that draw the eye up toward the face.

Which one do you naturally reach for most often? Let me know below.

Fit notes:

Loft v-neck tee fits tts (in a size small)
J.Crew Factory white crewneck tee (fits small, I sized up to a medium)
Quince wide leg Bella stretch wide leg jeans, seaside blue, size up one, in 30 inch inseam

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

At 40, I didn’t recognize my body after having a perimenopausal weight gain. Adam and I were
just dating then, and he wanted me to meet his ex.

Getting dressed was incredibly hard. I went out to all the stores and tried on a million things, feeling inadequate the whole time. If only I could figure out the thing that I could wear that would put me at ease enough to just walk into the room.

Recently I heard Anne Hathaway’s stylist, Erin Walsh, talk about how clothing can act as protection, and it immediately resonated with me.

Body changes can make getting dressed feel surprisingly emotional. I’ve been there. You’re just trying to feel okay in your body again.

If you’ve been reaching for more coverage, darker colors, or looser silhouettes lately, I get it.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Sunday morning before heading to the grocery store, I couldn’t string two sentences together, but I did like my outfit. I sized up one in these Madewell jeans and this Old Navy t-shirt (to a large). When it comes to clogs, I always look for non-wooden soles. I find them to be very uncomfortable. I linked similar clogs since these from Target are low in stock.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert

A lot of chattering happens in this video. Hear about my desire to try to feel somewhat hip when I’m going to see my college-aged nephews. And how we’re dealing with both of my nephews graduating from college (Virginia Tech and UVA) on the same weekend. Size down in these jeans. Captions are autogenerated. Please forgive errors.

#LTKgrwm #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Get ready with me on a day I don’t feel like getting dressed. Catch some Devil Wears Prada references (and even an 80s inspired Family Ties reference at the end). These drawstring jeans fit true to size. I’m wearing a small in this Old Navy tee. This bag and sweatshirt are old so I linked some alternatives in case stock gets low. Xo, Marya

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

Today’s dressing room try-on outfit. These @onequince linen pants and denim utility jacket fit TTS, I’m in a Medium for both.

I really want to be the kind of woman who doesn’t care what anyone thinks of what’s she’s wearing and just wears what she loves without considering whether it’s the most flattering choice from every angle.

But I’m also a Gen X girl who grew up with Kate Moss when ultra thinness was presented as the ultimate goal. And where women like Sarah Ferguson and Oprah Winfrey were publicly mocked for their weight in tabloids like it was entertainment.

Those messages got in deep.

So even now, there’s still a part of me that instinctively thinks about whether something makes me look slimmer, smaller, or more conventionally flattering.

But there’s also this other part of me that just wants the freedom to wear what I genuinely think is cute without giving it a second thought.

To wear the cap sleeves.
The eye-catching thick horizontal stripes.
The outfit that feels magnetic.

This is the bind that many women live with.

For me, it’s a work in progress. Right now I cope by making “flattering” the priority in situations where I feel more vulnerable to judgment from others and want to feel more at ease.

And other times I just want to show up as me.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKOver40

Today’s outfit for the dentist. Fun fact: these sneakers made an appearance in the movie, “People We Meet On Vacation”. Fit notes: I size down in these LOFT wide leg cropped jeans. This Oxford cloth shirt is oversized.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I got a question from a follower asking about cap sleeves and whether they accentuate the upper arms compared to other short-sleeve styles, so of course I had to film them side by side.

And I know this conversation matters because in a recent survey I did about summer style struggles, showing your arms came in as the top stressor for 39% of you when getting dressed in the summer.

I’ve always loved the cap-sleeve tee as someone who is smaller up top and larger on the bottom because it visually widens my upper body, creates more balanced proportions, and gives me more of an hourglass shape.

But seeing these side by side sparked some thoughts I wasn’t expecting.

I’ll be sharing more about that in tomorrow’s Reel because this turned into a much bigger conversation for me than just sleeve styles.

But first, I want to know your vote:
👉Cap sleeve, classic short sleeve, or elbow-length sleeve?

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

Olive green, cognac brown, and white look so sharp together. This olive tee has a relaxed fit, but it’s short. I wear a small. I’m wearing my true size in these white jeans.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I’ve always had a complicated relationship with shorts, and based on my recent poll, a lot of you do too. So these are the 4 styles I actually wear.

• LOFT Curvy Monroe Chino Shorts (black)
10.75” rise | 6” inseam | size 10 (TTS)
Classic chino shorts with a slightly relaxed fit.

• LOFT Curvy Monroe Chino Shorts (white)
10.75” rise | 6” inseam | size 10 (TTS)
Same fit as the black pair with minimal pocket show-through.

• Old Navy High Rise Baggy Jean Shorts
12.5” rise | 5” inseam | sized up one
Soft denim with a relaxed, baggy fit. These are surprisingly soft and comfy. They sell out early in the season.

• Gap Linen Tie Waist Shorts (blue stripe)
12” rise | 6” inseam | size medium (TTS)
Lightweight linen with a drawstring waist. So easy to wear and in a cute stripe (comes in multiple colors and you can get a separate matched shirt for a set).

If you carry weight in your hips and thighs like I do, a looser leg + higher rise makes all the difference.

And if shorts still aren’t your thing, you’re not alone. I’ve got plenty of alternatives too 🤍

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This is the newest style of shorts I added to my closet. They’re from the Gap and I picked them up on sale.
These are lightweight, breathable, and high on comfort. They have a 12” rise and a 6” inseam, and I’m wearing a medium, which is true to the size chart.
The navy and cream stripe makes them feel a little more styled than a basic pair of shorts, and the drawstring waist adds to the comfort.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I love the black pair so much that I bought them in white too.
Same classic chino style and fit, same 10.75” rise, same 6” inseam. I’m still in my usual size 10.
One thing I always look for in white shorts is how much the pockets show through, and these have minimal show-through, which is a win. I’m wearing this tee in a size small. It fits big.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

These are a classic chino short from LOFT and they’ve been a staple in my closet for a while.
They have a 10.75” rise and a 6” inseam, which hits that sweet spot for me. I wear my usual size 10, and they fit true to size with a slightly relaxed feel. I’m in a small in this light blue tee.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

These jean shorts are so good and tend to sell out early in the season, so if you find your size, it’s worth grabbing them. They’re soft, comfortable, and have that relaxed, slightly baggy fit.
They have a 12.5” rise and a 5” inseam. I sized up one to get an even looser fit. I love how a looser leg makes my thighs look smaller. This light blue tee is from Old Navy. I’m wearing this size small because if fits big.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This navy stripe dress gives tons of structure thanks to the collar and button placket. I’ve been feeling like a marshmallow in some dresses lately so this is the perfect counter to that. It’s breathable cotton poplin and so comfortable. I tried a medium and it was way too big up top so I sized down to a small. Wear to work, a graduation, Mother’s Day. It’s under $60 with an extra 20% off in cart.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This Amazon dress is made from a nice fabric that has a linen-like feel but is low wrinkles. It’s lightweight but not see through. It has pockets, an elastic defined waist and short sleeves. It fits true to the sizing chart. I’m in a medium. This is perfect for work, or a special event. It’s on the shortlist for my nephews’ graduations.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

Wear this for a summer wedding, graduation or Mother’s Day. The ruffles up top are a great option if you have a small and slim upper body. I’m in a Medium. It comes in multiple colors and prints. It’s on major sale right now.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I have a complicated relationship with shorts, and based on a recent Story survey, so do many of you.

When I asked what you’re wearing instead, more than half said linen or light wide leg pants (53%).

And I get it.

They’re light, breathable, and easy, but still feel pulled together enough for real life.

If shorts aren’t your first choice, these linen pants outfits are a really good place to start.

Fit note: these wide leg linen pants in color “flax” from @onequince fit true to size and come in three inseams (26”, 28”, and 30”). I’m wearing the 28” in size medium. New customers can get 10% off their first purchase with code INFG-26BESOYOUMIDLIFE10. They’re under $45.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSeasonal #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Here I’m wearing a short-sleeve cardigan buttoned up as a top for a work look.
I tried it untucked, but it felt a little long, so I prefer it tucked in. Nude ballet flats and a matching tote finish the look and keep everything cohesive. These khaki linen pants fit true to size. I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert