Be_So_You on LTK

At 40, I didn’t recognize my body after having a perimenopausal weight gain. Adam and I were just dating then, and he wanted me to meet his ex. Getting dressed was incredibly hard. I went out to all the stores and tried on a million things, feeling inadequate the whole time. If only I could figure out the thing that I could wear that would put me at ease enough to just walk into the room. Recently I heard Anne Hathaway’s stylist, Erin Walsh, talk about how clothing can act as protection, and it immediately resonated with me. Body changes can make getting dressed feel surprisingly emotional. I’ve been there. You’re just trying to feel okay in your body again. If you’ve been reaching for more coverage, darker colors, or looser silhouettes lately, I get it. 📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans. LTKSaleAlert LTKOver40 LTKMidsize

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Semiprecious Beaded Choker Necklace | Madewell

T-bar Chain Necklace-Gold Colour | Boden (US)

Chunky T-bar Chain Necklace-Gold | Boden (US)

Stripe Perfect Ribbed Elbow Sleeve Tee | LOFT

My twin nephews are graduating from college this weekend. One is at Virginia Tech where Adam and I both went, and the other is at UVA (where we live). We’re attending both graduation ceremonies, so we’ll be driving between schools.

Seeing younger generations up close always makes me curious about how all of us think about aging, style, visibility, and evolving.

I’d love to know:

Has your relationship with getting dressed changed as you’ve gotten older? If so, how?

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

This top came home with me today, it’s so cute and the perfect brown-copper color. It runs wide, I ended up sizing down to an XS. It’s 24” long rather than the 21” that so many tops are these days. It’s on sale for $25.

99% of the time when I’m wearing shorts, I’m also throwing on a denim utility jacket because I get cold in air conditioning.

Since the tee has a relaxed fit and drop sleeves, and the shorts are relaxed too, I like the structure the jacket adds to the outfit. The lapels, shoulder shape, and vertical lines help balance all the softness.

You may notice I tucked the tee in under the jacket here, but you could also leave it untucked.

Gotta love these autogenerated captions…they’re good for a chuckle today. Yes, I do stay away from oversized teeth.

@oldnavy tee relaxed fit, I’m in my true size small
@gap shorts, fits tts, in a medium
@onequince denim utility jacket fits tts, I’m in a medium
@toms platform sandals with Velcro ankle strap super cushioned (gifted)

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

I had a request to show a side by side comparison of a V-neck tee versus a crewneck tee for those of you trying to decide which neckline you like best on yourself.

A V-neck creates a longer vertical line and is traditionally considered more slimming because it draws the eye up and down.

If you’re fuller through the bust or upper body, a V-neck can create a longer, leaner visual effect.

A crewneck gives a little more visual presence to the upper body, so if you’re smaller up top, it’s a great option. Styled with layered necklaces, it can also feel a bit more current.

Neither is right or wrong. They just create a slightly different effect and vibe.

Personally, I find myself reaching for crewnecks more these days because I’m smaller through my upper body than my lower half, so I like the balancing effect a crewneck creates with my larger bottom half. My eye is also craving that fresher style, especially paired with some blingy necklaces that draw the eye up toward the face.

Which one do you naturally reach for most often? Let me know below.

Fit notes:

Loft v-neck tee fits tts (in a size small)
J.Crew Factory white crewneck tee (fits small, I sized up to a medium)
Quince wide leg Bella stretch wide leg jeans, seaside blue, size up one, in 30 inch inseam

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Sunday morning before heading to the grocery store, I couldn’t string two sentences together, but I did like my outfit. I sized up one in these Madewell jeans and this Old Navy t-shirt (to a large). When it comes to clogs, I always look for non-wooden soles. I find them to be very uncomfortable. I linked similar clogs since these from Target are low in stock.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert

A lot of chattering happens in this video. Hear about my desire to try to feel somewhat hip when I’m going to see my college-aged nephews. And how we’re dealing with both of my nephews graduating from college (Virginia Tech and UVA) on the same weekend. Size down in these jeans. Captions are autogenerated. Please forgive errors.

#LTKgrwm #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Get ready with me on a day I don’t feel like getting dressed. Catch some Devil Wears Prada references (and even an 80s inspired Family Ties reference at the end). These drawstring jeans fit true to size. I’m wearing a small in this Old Navy tee. This bag and sweatshirt are old so I linked some alternatives in case stock gets low. Xo, Marya

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

Today’s dressing room try-on outfit. These @onequince linen pants and denim utility jacket fit TTS, I’m in a Medium for both.

I really want to be the kind of woman who doesn’t care what anyone thinks of what’s she’s wearing and just wears what she loves without considering whether it’s the most flattering choice from every angle.

But I’m also a Gen X girl who grew up with Kate Moss when ultra thinness was presented as the ultimate goal. And where women like Sarah Ferguson and Oprah Winfrey were publicly mocked for their weight in tabloids like it was entertainment.

Those messages got in deep.

So even now, there’s still a part of me that instinctively thinks about whether something makes me look slimmer, smaller, or more conventionally flattering.

But there’s also this other part of me that just wants the freedom to wear what I genuinely think is cute without giving it a second thought.

To wear the cap sleeves.
The eye-catching thick horizontal stripes.
The outfit that feels magnetic.

This is the bind that many women live with.

For me, it’s a work in progress. Right now I cope by making “flattering” the priority in situations where I feel more vulnerable to judgment from others and want to feel more at ease.

And other times I just want to show up as me.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKOver40

Today’s outfit for the dentist. Fun fact: these sneakers made an appearance in the movie, “People We Meet On Vacation”. Fit notes: I size down in these LOFT wide leg cropped jeans. This Oxford cloth shirt is oversized.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I got a question from a follower asking about cap sleeves and whether they accentuate the upper arms compared to other short-sleeve styles, so of course I had to film them side by side.

And I know this conversation matters because in a recent survey I did about summer style struggles, showing your arms came in as the top stressor for 39% of you when getting dressed in the summer.

I’ve always loved the cap-sleeve tee as someone who is smaller up top and larger on the bottom because it visually widens my upper body, creates more balanced proportions, and gives me more of an hourglass shape.

But seeing these side by side sparked some thoughts I wasn’t expecting.

I’ll be sharing more about that in tomorrow’s Reel because this turned into a much bigger conversation for me than just sleeve styles.

But first, I want to know your vote:
👉Cap sleeve, classic short sleeve, or elbow-length sleeve?

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

Olive green, cognac brown, and white look so sharp together. This olive tee has a relaxed fit, but it’s short. I wear a small. I’m wearing my true size in these white jeans.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I’ve always had a complicated relationship with shorts, and based on my recent poll, a lot of you do too. So these are the 4 styles I actually wear.

• LOFT Curvy Monroe Chino Shorts (black)
10.75” rise | 6” inseam | size 10 (TTS)
Classic chino shorts with a slightly relaxed fit.

• LOFT Curvy Monroe Chino Shorts (white)
10.75” rise | 6” inseam | size 10 (TTS)
Same fit as the black pair with minimal pocket show-through.

• Old Navy High Rise Baggy Jean Shorts
12.5” rise | 5” inseam | sized up one
Soft denim with a relaxed, baggy fit. These are surprisingly soft and comfy. They sell out early in the season.

• Gap Linen Tie Waist Shorts (blue stripe)
12” rise | 6” inseam | size medium (TTS)
Lightweight linen with a drawstring waist. So easy to wear and in a cute stripe (comes in multiple colors and you can get a separate matched shirt for a set).

If you carry weight in your hips and thighs like I do, a looser leg + higher rise makes all the difference.

And if shorts still aren’t your thing, you’re not alone. I’ve got plenty of alternatives too 🤍

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This is the newest style of shorts I added to my closet. They’re from the Gap and I picked them up on sale.
These are lightweight, breathable, and high on comfort. They have a 12” rise and a 6” inseam, and I’m wearing a medium, which is true to the size chart.
The navy and cream stripe makes them feel a little more styled than a basic pair of shorts, and the drawstring waist adds to the comfort.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I love the black pair so much that I bought them in white too.
Same classic chino style and fit, same 10.75” rise, same 6” inseam. I’m still in my usual size 10.
One thing I always look for in white shorts is how much the pockets show through, and these have minimal show-through, which is a win. I’m wearing this tee in a size small. It fits big.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

These are a classic chino short from LOFT and they’ve been a staple in my closet for a while.
They have a 10.75” rise and a 6” inseam, which hits that sweet spot for me. I wear my usual size 10, and they fit true to size with a slightly relaxed feel. I’m in a small in this light blue tee.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

These jean shorts are so good and tend to sell out early in the season, so if you find your size, it’s worth grabbing them. They’re soft, comfortable, and have that relaxed, slightly baggy fit.
They have a 12.5” rise and a 5” inseam. I sized up one to get an even looser fit. I love how a looser leg makes my thighs look smaller. This light blue tee is from Old Navy. I’m wearing this size small because if fits big.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This navy stripe dress gives tons of structure thanks to the collar and button placket. I’ve been feeling like a marshmallow in some dresses lately so this is the perfect counter to that. It’s breathable cotton poplin and so comfortable. I tried a medium and it was way too big up top so I sized down to a small. Wear to work, a graduation, Mother’s Day. It’s under $60 with an extra 20% off in cart.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

This Amazon dress is made from a nice fabric that has a linen-like feel but is low wrinkles. It’s lightweight but not see through. It has pockets, an elastic defined waist and short sleeves. It fits true to the sizing chart. I’m in a medium. This is perfect for work, or a special event. It’s on the shortlist for my nephews’ graduations.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

Wear this for a summer wedding, graduation or Mother’s Day. The ruffles up top are a great option if you have a small and slim upper body. I’m in a Medium. It comes in multiple colors and prints. It’s on major sale right now.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I have a complicated relationship with shorts, and based on a recent Story survey, so do many of you.

When I asked what you’re wearing instead, more than half said linen or light wide leg pants (53%).

And I get it.

They’re light, breathable, and easy, but still feel pulled together enough for real life.

If shorts aren’t your first choice, these linen pants outfits are a really good place to start.

Fit note: these wide leg linen pants in color “flax” from @onequince fit true to size and come in three inseams (26”, 28”, and 30”). I’m wearing the 28” in size medium. New customers can get 10% off their first purchase with code INFG-26BESOYOUMIDLIFE10. They’re under $45.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSeasonal #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Here I’m wearing a short-sleeve cardigan buttoned up as a top for a work look.
I tried it untucked, but it felt a little long, so I prefer it tucked in. Nude ballet flats and a matching tote finish the look and keep everything cohesive. These khaki linen pants fit true to size. I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

A white-collared cable-knit sweater is one of the easiest ways to dress up khaki linen pants for work. The collar adds just enough structure to elevate the outfit.
These wide leg linen pants fit her a size I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKMidsize #LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert

I love a striped tee with khaki linen pants. This version has long sleeves for a cooler day, but you could easily swap in a short-sleeve version.
I layered a denim utility jacket over the top and finished the look with navy sneakers and a matching tote. I love the big front pockets on this jacket; they’re perfect for your phone. These khaki linen wide leg pants fit true to size. I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize #LTKOver40

Nothing beats drawstring linen pants on a travel day. They feel like sweatpants but look more pulled together.
I paired a gray tee (which is great for travel-day spills) with a gray sweatshirt.
These @onequince wide leg linen pants fit true to size. I’m in medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize #LTKSaleAlert

I’m wearing a white dolman-sleeve blouse with a collar, which instantly makes the outfit feel more put-together. This LOFT dolman shirt has a gauze material that’s so light and comfy. Wear it tucked in or out. These are the @onequince khaki wide leg linen pants. They fit true to size. I’m a medium and the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

This outfit has that easy, breezy feel without looking too relaxed. I’m wearing a tucked-in white tee with a light blue button-down layered over it. A tank top is a great option too, if you wear them.
These Quince wide leg khaki linen pants fit true to size. I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

This is one of those outfits that looks polished and put together, but it’s incredibly simple. I’m wearing a navy elbow-length tee tucked into khaki linen pants with cognac suede sneakers and a matching cognac crossbody bag.
These wide leg linen pants from Quince fit true to size. I’m in a medium in the 28 inch inseam.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

I love this outfit because it’s so simple but still feels finished. I’m wearing a black cap-sleeve tee (the LOFT Modern Wedge tee, which I own in multiple colors). It runs big, so I size down. These Quince wide leg linen pants fit TTS. I’m in the 28” inseam and a size medium.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

Friday night’s outfit to see The Devil Wears Prada 2. Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy was often spotted in simple outfits with kick crop jeans, black tees, and long black jackets. LOFT kick crop jeans fit TTS in the curvy fit. I’m in an XS for this LOFT tee (fits big) and a large in this Amazon cardigan sweater. Have you seen the movie?

#LTKgrwm #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize

The shoes really wake up this outfit. It’s a small switch, but it takes it from simple to styled.

Sneakers keep it sporty, but the leopard Mary Jane mules make it feel cute and ready for lunch and beyond.

Fit notes:
These J.Crew Factory curvy midrise straight jeans fit TTS.
Similar options are linked for the sweatshirt and mules.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKgrwm #LTKMidsize #LTKOver40

We’re going to see the Devil Wears Prada 2 tonight at a Cinema Drafthouse. White jeans are not recommended for eating dinner in a dark movie theater so I won’t be wearing this. Lol. But the outfit is cute! These LOFT jeans fit tts. This sweater is old. Similar one is linked.

#LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize

Please forgive caption errors (they’re autogenerated). If you’ve been here a while, you’ll notice I share multiple ways to style the same pieces, especially dresses.

That’s not by accident.

Dress shopping can be hard, so when I find one that actually works, I need it to work a lot of ways. I usually have just a handful of dresses I rotate through all spring and summer.

So instead of constantly searching for something new, I focus on finding one that fits well… and then I restyle it with different shoes, bags, and layering pieces to change the look.

If you have a hard-to-fit body, this can be a game changer.

Find one that works, grab it in multiple colors if you can, and use your styling to create different looks for different occasions.

On me: I own this black maxi dress from LOFT in two colors. I linked a Reel where I show all the different layers to wear it. It fits a little big, I’m in a small.

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKMidsize #LTKOver40

Thanks to everyone who responded to my shorts poll in Stories. Your answers are helping me decide what to share more of this summer.

These are some of the pieces I reach for when I want to stay cool without wearing shorts.

Fit notes:
Quince wide leg linen pants (in a medium, 28” inseam, true to size)
LOFT tee dress in black and cream (in a medium)
LOFT white denim skirt (sized up for an easy fit and no pulling at the buttons)
Target black midi skirt (medium fit me, but was snug so I went up to a large for a looser fit)
LOFT black midi dress (runs big, wearing a small)

I shared a total of 10 shorts alternatives on LTK, and you can also see them all at BeSoYou.com.

Coming soon: the best shorts I’ve found for a curvy size 10 bottom half and linen pants outfit ideas 🤍

📏For reference, I’m midsized, 5’6”, slightly short-waisted, 36-B bust, and wear a small or medium top with size 10 jeans.

#LTKMidsize #LTKOver40 #LTKSaleAlert

I want to live in this outfit this summer. In the past, I’ve struggled to find linen pants I can easily wear with flats, and these come in 3 inseams: 26”, 28”, and 30”. I wore these out to dine al fresco at lunch on an 85 degree day and was perfectly comfortable in the shade. They fit true to the sizing chart. I’m in a Medium in the flax with a 28” inseam. Also in a medium in this tee.

#LTKSaleAlert #LTKOver40 #LTKMidsize