rachelvarina on LTK

‼️GIVEAWAY ALERT‼️ Win a $175 worth of ways to get off 🖤 It’s the most magical day of the year: Harry Potter’s birthday and NationalOrgasmDay (yup, today is the day to get off, my friends)! To celebrate, I’m not telling you what I’m doing because my MIL follows me on Instagram. BUT I’ve ALSO teamed up with some phenomenal female-founded brands to help you celebrate, whether with your SO or solo. 🖤 Today celebrates sexual climax and raises awareness for issues surrounding orgasms. Recently, I’ve been slowly shifting to sex-positive content, editorial, and exploration because it. is. so. Important. Not only do orgasms have a zillion health benefits but uh...have you had one? They’re pretty fucking great. SO, whether you’re a sex toy pro or new to the game, let’s remove the shame and celebrate. 🖤 THE PRIZES (swipe for info on each product) 💦Her Highness CBD Pleasure Oil "Highly Orgasmic” 💦Banana Emojibator  💦Chili Pepper Emojibator 💦TOCA TOTO CBD Lubricant 🖤 To enter, simply: 1. Follow @rachelvarina, @HerHighnessNYC, @Emojibator, & @TocaBotanica 2. Like this photo 3. Comment below and tag the person you wanna get dirty with or a pal who could use some orgasmically good times. 🖤 (each separate tag up to twenty counts as an additional entry) 🖤 (No purchase necessary. This giveaway is in no way affiliated with Instagram. Giveaway ends at 11:59 PM EST on 8/3. Winner will be announced on 8/4 via comment, DM, and story) ‼️‼️‼️ PS: the first photo was taken a week before my wedding when I weighed considerably less. I don’t want this post to come across as trying to act like THAT’S when I felt sexy and not now. Jon (my husband) is just the worst photographer in the world & I haven’t had the chance to take more boudoir photos. Hence: the last photo. IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE. You can have greasy hair, unplucked brows, & chipped nails & you STILL deserve to feel hot and get off.✌️ 🤫 pps: ship the costume via the @liketoknow.it app. liketkit LTKunder50 LTKunder100 LTKcurves giveaway free http://liketk.it/2Tum9

Shop this post

Paid links

messy wife messy life?🤷‍♀️

I honestly never thought I’d have the courage (or sheer will, tbh) to pull a skintight latex dress over my skin, let alone after gaining a lot of weight. It’s one of those “skinny hot girl” looks I was too afraid to try.

& then? I was bored, browsing Amazon, & figured what the hell? The worst thing that would happen was it would be too small & I’d forget to return it and it would sit in my closet until I died.

No, this isn’t a motivational post about how you shouldn’t be afraid to try new things, to branch out, to wear the bold dress & be proud of your curves. Nah, this post is to shame myself into finalllly cleaning the house. Now, I wonder if this dress is breathable?💕✌️
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
~screenshot this post to get the dress deets + a few of my other latex faves on the @liketoknow.it app so you, too, can take selfies instead of picking up your shit~ #liketkit #LTKcurves http://liketk.it/2XG23

& as the not-so-holy gospel goes: on sept 1st the basics said “let it be fall” & so it was fall.🖤

like my hair? gee thanks, just bought it from @insertnamehere 💇‍♀️ dress gifted from @adriannapapell 👗 photos from the talented @chaveliguzman 📸 basic bitch fall time excitement is alllllll mine.
http://liketk.it/2VEyW #liketkit @liketoknow.it #LTKcurves #LTKunder50 #LTKunder100

Yesterday a lifetime ago (aka senior year of college), my ex and I broke up (side note: THANK GOD). After standing outside my apartment saying our goodbyes, I headed straight to the bar — my face tear-stained and my hair undone — to celebrate my sorority big sister @kels__kelss’s 21st birthday.

In about .45 seconds I was wasted and within a few hours, I was texting my ex. A different ex. The one I could never get out of my head, despite not talking for what felt like forever.

He was home and sober and agreed to pick me up. He told me years later that he knew my booty call would lead to us getting back together. That’s why he got in his car.

He called me when he was outside the bar, and my heart ached as I opened the door. I hadn’t sat on those seats, I haven’t looked into those blue eyes, I haven’t heard that soothing voice in close to two years.

To fill you in on what happened after, I’ll quote the great “Mamma Mia!” and say: “dot dot dot.”

Now, here we are seven years later, arguing over who gets to use the home office, having ice fights in the kitchen, and making fun of each other’s television preferences.

If the photo isn’t proof enough, I’m NEVER letting this goober pie go — no matter how hard he tries to get away.😈

👗 style p.s. 👗: I wore this dress to a wedding (pre-COVID) and got a zillion compliments despite kinda feeling like a lamp shade. Shop it on the @liketoknow.it app because if we can’t go places, we might as well waste our money online shopping.🤷‍♀️ http://liketk.it/2TTiq #liketkit #LTKcurves #LTKstyletip #LTKunder50

It’s been about 84 years since I posted to Instagram, &even longer since I posted myself, in my current form, confidently.

Since my wedding in 2018, I’ve gained upwards of 35 pounds. For anyone, that’s enough to really wound self-esteem. For me, a person who has battled anorexia, bulimia, clinical depression &anxiety, it’s sent me spiraling.

The “most embarrassing” part of gaining weight (I put that in quotes because it 👏 is 👏 not 👏 a 👏 point 👏 of 👏 shame 👏) is when others notice. When they give you the once over — take in your fuller face, bigger stomach, and thicker legs. When the look on their faces say, “what happened? you really let yourself go. are you okay?”

I’ve bounced around with what to do. Do I diet like I did before my wedding, when friends &strangers would tell me how good, how skinny, how hot I had become? I thought about it.

But it just didn’t sit right. Because to be honest? I’m exhausted. I’m so tired of checking the scale, spending days eating just lettuce &chicken, restricting &binging, begging myself to become a “better” me.

So last week, I did something different. I put away the scale that I’ve religiously stood on since college. I ordered a Fitbit. I got some pairs of plus-size clothing, &I had a few (socially distanced) shoots with photographers.

Before, I would have said: We’ll get new clothes &pics when we get back to our deal size. THAT will be your reward. But again, I’m fucking tired. I’m tired of thinking I can’t look good at a heavier weight. That my value is lower because my jean size went up. That I can’t pretend to be a fucking model &get some fire pictures because my abs are MIA.

It’s bullshit, &for the first time ever, I ACTUALLY see it. Instead of weigh ins or restrictions, I’m taking daily walks. I’m eating more whole grains and salads. I’m cutting back on wine and snacking less on pizza. I’m making REAL healthy choices, for the first time in my life. &the reason isn’t to ~look better~ (because I’m a fucking babe rn), it’s just to feel better. Whether that means my abs will come back or I’ll get to keep these new, bigger boobs — I’m cool either way. http://liketk.it/2T2sV #liketkit @liketoknow.it #LTKcurves