christie_ferrari on LTK

christie_ferrari

A well set table + well set boundaries = your peace. Comment Furniture for links & pieces are from @cityfurniture

Want more scripts? Comment Assertive & I’ll send you to my member’s area where you can learn all the words & tips you need to help you take back your power this holiday season.

And comment OUTFIT for a link to this black blazer romper (not a dress).

A well set table + well set boundaries = your peace. Comment Furniture for links & pieces are from @cityfurniture Want more scripts? Comment Assertive & I’ll send you to my member’s area where you can learn all the words & tips you need to help you take back your power this holiday season. And comment OUTFIT for a link to this black blazer romper (not a dress).

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Easy winter outfit. Just swap out the shoes for boots.

Ridging leggings, winter leggings, skiing leggings, winter jacket, grey sweater

#LTKHoliday #LTKSeasonal #LTKootd

Winter outfit idea.

Winter layering.

Brown pants, brown leather vest, brown suede jacket

#LTKHoliday #LTKootd #LTKWorkwear

Winter skirt set. Wore this set for Thanksgiving. Can easily be paired with a black turtleneck and black stockings for layering for the winter.

#LTKHoliday #LTKWorkwear #LTKootd

Caraway nontoxic pots are on sale.

#LTKHome #LTKGiftGuide #LTKCyberWeek

Beige blazer dress. Beige heels.

Holiday outfit idea, party outfit

#LTKHoliday #LTKootd #LTKPetite

Comment Mean Girl for exact words & tips to use, so you can take back your power this holiday season instead of freezing up, all found inside my member’s area Assertive You.

And comment Bootcamp to join my Mean Girl Bootcamp when she’s in your family this Tuesday at noon. Can’t join? I’ll send you a link to rewatch it before Thanksgiving!

Comment Outfit for links.

As for the 4 tactics Mean girls in your family pull during the holidays to make you dread family gatherings

She always brings the drama & somehow ruins the day even after you’ve been tiptoeing around her for hours. Because if there’s chaos, the whole day ends up revolving around her.

She talks about plans with the other sisters or sister in laws right in front of you (shopping dates, girls dinners), as if you were never an option. She does it so you know where you fit in the family pecking order.

She stirs the pot by giving each sibling a slightly different version of the same story, always starting with, “Don’t tell them I said this.”
So everyone walks in tense and confused, and no one knows why the room feels off, except her.

She loves tossing subtle digs your way, then watching your reaction like a hawk. And if you call it out, you get a “I’m just kidding.” Except she wasn’t.

Holiday party outfit idea

Black romper, white romper, tuxedo romper, New Year’s Eve outfit, holiday outfit #LTKParties

#LTKHoliday #LTKPetite

The other night with @patbo & @camilacoelho

Last night’s look for a charity.

Wearing this beautiful Alexis dress that comes in other color ways.

#LTKPetite #LTKHoliday #LTKParties

Holiday dressing.

Palm beach style, New Year’s Eve dress, sequin dress, gold bag

#LTKParties #LTKStyleTip #LTKHoliday

Comment Mean Girl for exact words & tips to use, so you can take back you power this holiday season instead of freezing up, all found inside my member’s area Assertive You. Also inside, a place to ask me anonymous consult questions and access to my Mean Girl guides.

Comment Outfit for links. Red matching set, Thanksgiving outfit, holiday outfit

As for the 4 things Mean Girls do during the Holidays to make you feel left out

You find out you weren’t invited to Friendsgiving through someone’s story, the “so grateful for my girls” kind, posted like you wouldn’t notice.

And if you do bring it up later, they’ll act surprised: “You should’ve come!” as if you were the one who misunderstood. Because playing innocent keeps their image clean and leaves you questioning your worth.

They “accidentally” show you their packed holiday plans. The dinners, the Secret Santa exchange, the cookie-decorating play date. The point isn’t to include you, it’s to remind you you’re not part of any of it.

They slip in subtle digs disguised as small talk: “Oh, you’re doing plastic holiday decorations this year? “That’s cute, we just do fresh garlands, I love how festive they smell.”
It’s not about decorations, it’s status-checking, a quiet way to remind you they stand a little above you.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, ACT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

#LTKHoliday #LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKParties

Fall outfit idea

Fall work outfit idea, Thanksgiving outfit idea, winter outfit idea

#LTKStyleTip #LTKWorkwear #LTKHoliday

Tonight’s pink dress.

Party dress, date night dress, girls night outfit, New Year’s Eve outfit

#LTKSeasonal #LTKParties #LTKStyleTip

Fall outfit idea. Wearing today at University of Miami

Black vegan leather shorts from Amazon, black blazer jacket, black heels

#LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKStyleTip #LTKU

Today’s fall outfit for a talk at my son’s school.

#LTKPetite #LTKSeasonal #LTKHoliday

Comment MEAN GIRL for exact words & tips to use if you’re experiencing this so you don’t lose your confidence (or your circle) in the process. And if one person can quietly shift an entire group’s perception of you, without ever saying anything technically wrong? That’s not “drama.” That’s social manipulation.

Comment Outfit for links.

And share your story how you handled a mean girl that was running a smear campaign about you.

As for the 4 Reasons Everyone Buys the Mean Girl’s Lies Before Hearing Your Side, it’s because:

It was told first so it becomes the default “truth.” Meanwhile, the person being targeted looks defensive, shocked, or quiet which people confuse with guilt.

Social rejection is scarier. So we adopt the beliefs of the group to be safe & to belong even if it doesn’t sit right with us privately.

We process & remember negative information more quickly & for longer than positive details. We treat it like a warning, “remember this so you don’t get hurt.”

Once you’re labeled as “the problem,”
people start seeing everything they do through that lens. Even normal behavior looks like “proof.” And sharing outrage? It bonds people.
It’s gossip disguised as virtue.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, ACT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Leopard 🐆 outfit for date night.

Brown heels, brown mules, date night outfit idea, leopard dress, fall outfit

#LTKShoeCrush #LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKStyleTip

Comment FRIEND to join my How to Find the Right Friends Workshop this Saturday & learn how to finally stop walking the whole distance alone from day 1. You’ll learn:

-How to attract the right people
-How to stop over-functioning
-How to build mutual effort without begging for it

Comment OUTFIT for links!

Comment ASSERTIVE for instant access to my 2 newest guides: Fringe Friend No More & Go First: Your 6-Week Roadmap to Making the Right Friends, both inside my members’ area, Assertive You.

As for the 3 Reasons You Can’t Find Friends Who Meet You Halfway it’s because:

You don’t leave space for others to show up.
You fill every silence in conversation, fix awkward moments, and over explain to keep the peace. But when you do it all, you unintentionally train them to do less.

You confuse effort with connection.
You think the more you give, the stronger the friendship but real connection only works when the effort is mutual.

You make it too easy for people not to try.
You plan & text before anyone else even thinks to. You mean well but over time, they stop initiating because they know you’ll do it.

The right friendships will meet you halfway but first, you have to stop walking the whole distance for everyone else.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Comment Mean Girls for the exact words & tips to use if you’re experiencing this so you don’t lose your confidence (or your circle) in the process. And if one person can quietly shift an entire group’s perception of you, without ever saying anything technically wrong? That’s not “drama.” That’s social manipulation.

Comment Outfit for links.

And share your story below, if this has happened to you.

As for the 4 Ways a Mean Girl Covert Narcissist Rewrites the Story to Make You the Villain:

They label you before you can label them.
“She’s crazy.” “She’s dramatic.”
They say it first so when you finally speak up, it sounds like the story they already warned others about.

They twist your strengths into flaws.
Confident? She’s Intimidating.
Kind? She’s Fake.
Set boundaries? She’s cold.
They can’t handle what makes you respected, so they try to discredit it.

They’ll accuse you of copying them. Translation: she needs to stay the original so she can stay in control. This is about her need for power & hierarchy.

And they play the victim, loudly. They’ll hint that you’re the problem so others rush to comfort them. The goal isn’t truth, it’s sympathy and social power.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Comment FRIEND to learn the exact scripts & tips in my live workshop so you can stop forcing connections that drain you and start finding aligned friendships that feel mutual from the start. Because if you don’t change how you build friendships, you’ll keep creating the same one-sided connections and calling them friendship.

Saturday, October 25th at 10am EST
& will be available for my Assertive You community. To join, comment FRIEND & I’ll send you a message.

Comment OUTFIT for links to this dress

Comment ASSERTIVE for instant access to my 2 newest guides: Fringe Friend No More & Go First: Your 6-Week Roadmap to Making the Right Friends, both inside my members’ area, Assertive You.

& say Hi if you’re open to meeting new friends, you never know who will reply!

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Comment Mean Girls for the exact words & tips to use if you’re experiencing this so you don’t lose your confidence (or your circle) in the process. And if one person can quietly shift an entire group’s perception of you, without ever saying anything technically wrong? That’s not “drama.” That’s social manipulation.

Comment Outfit for links.

And share your story below, if this has happened to you.

As for the 4 Ways a Mean Girl Narcissist Gets Your Friends to Pull Away from You, she:

-She plants concern (“she’s sweet but…) about you in casual chats just enough to make people question your stability, judgment, or motives, without ever saying anything directly.

“I don’t want to talk behind her back, but…”
“That was… kind of weird, right?”
“She’s sweet but…”

-She gets close to your friends one-on-one, subtly shifting loyalty until you’re left out of plans and they’re convinced it “just happened that way.”

-When you finally speak up or set a boundary, she rewrites the story so you become the villain and suddenly, she’s the one everyone feels sorry for.

-She tells half the story, the half that makes you look bad. Not the part about what she said or did that led up to it.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Halloween decor

Ghost Halloween decorations, Funboy Halloween, blow up Halloween, hanging ghosts, smoke machine

#LTKHome #LTKHalloween #LTKSeasonal

Comment Glasses for outfit links to these from @shopeyeconic @vspvisioncare

If you want to see how these would look on your face, they have an easy, virtual try on tool on eyeconic.com. They have a great selection from Longchamp and Kendra Scott to Calvin Klein and Lacoste (like the ones I’m wearing here). And you can connect your VSP vision benefits for extra savings on your new pairs.

People make up their mind about you in just 3 seconds & one of the first things they notice? Are your eyes. They tell your whole story, confidence, warmth, and approachability, all before you even say a word.

Put on something you don’t like, and you’re suddenly shrinking back, second guessing yourself, without even realizing what you put on was doing half the talking.

So next time you wonder if your glasses matter? They do. When you like how you look, you like how you feel. And when you feel good, you show up better everywhere, in friendships & all. And the right eyewear can make all the difference. #vspvisioncare

#LTKStyleTip #LTKPetite #LTKItBag

Fall outfit ideas, warm fall weather outfit ideas, fall denim, fall sweater, Amazon fall outfit ideas

Comment Mean Girl for exact tips & phrases to handle these scenarios, also found inside my member’s area Assertive You.

& Comment Outfit for outfit links.

As for the 4 Ways Boy Moms Are Mean Girl Moms Too:

-They treat “boy mom” as an identity badge & cluster only with other boy moms, turning it into a tribe outsiders can’t join.

-At birthday parties, they make parties “boys only,” as a way to quietly exclude moms who aren’t in their circle.

-You invite them to your child’s party, they ignore the chat then when your son asks their son why they didn’t come, he says they were “just at home doing nothing.” The real message? Your child isn’t worthy of being their child’s friend.

-At school pick-up, they make a big show of saying hello, sometimes loudly in front of others, then dart off before any real conversation can happen. It looks polite, but really keeps you at arm’s length.

#LTKStyleTip #LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKSeasonal

Comment Podcast for a deep dive conversation on friendships. Thank you @valerialipovetsky for having me on your @notalonepod!

Green dress, fall dress, gold bag, brown mules, fall outfit

& Comment Friend for more phrases & tips to help you make the right friends & finally belong in your friendships. All inside my new 6-week roadmap where I walk you through the entire friend dating process so you can finally break this cycle and start finding friendships that last and feel like home.

& Comment OUTFIT for outfit links from @shopbop

As for the 3 things you can do now to make new friends & stop feeling lonely:

-Stop looking for your best friend and look for who is the most approachable person that you see most often.

-Then ask them out with a time bound invite.
Instead of “Let’s hang out sometime,” try: “Want to go for a walk tomorrow morning or this weekend with me?”

-And on the friend date, use the 50/50 rule: For every 5 minutes, notice, are you doing all the asking, or all the talking? Adjust so it’s balanced relationship from the start.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Xo,
Dr. C

#LTKItBag #LTKStyleTip #LTKShoeCrush

Comment Frenemy for scripts & tips to help you spot & handle frenemies. Frenemies don’t just cut you off, they give you just enough warmth to keep you close, while quietly undermining you and why frenemies are harder to spot than mean girls and keep you hooked in toxic dynamics.

And comment OUTFIT if you’d like links to what I’m wearing.

As for the 4 signs Your Friend Is Really a Frenemy & why that hurts more than a mean girl:

-They’re a selective cheerleader & will only cheer for you if it makes them look good
-Otherwise they’ll go silent when you succeed
-They stay close enough to benefit from you (status, invites, access) while also keeping you in “your place” with backhanded compliments or subtle digs.
-They secretly prefer you struggling. They feel closer to you because they feel superior when you’re down but flip when you start doing good.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Amazon outfit, fall outfit, leopard jeans, black sweater, fall going out outfit, fall dress, leopard dress

#LTKPetite #LTKParties #LTKStyleTip

Comment Friend for the exact words & tips to use in my new guide, Your 6-Week Roadmap to Find & Meet the Right Friends so you can finally break this cycle, stop being lonely in your friendships, and you can start finding the ones that last and feel like home.

And say Hi if you’re open to meeting new friends, you never know who will reply!

And comment OUTFIT for links.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Comment Friend for the words & strategies in my new guide, How to find & meet the right friends so you can finally break this cycle, and stop being a magnet for one-sided friendships and start finding the ones that last.

And say Hi if you’re open to meeting new friends, you never know who will reply!

And comment OUTFIT for links.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Black adjustable visor hat, black and gold sunglasses, blue polka dot dress, leopard dress, brown mules

Comment “Mean Girls” for exact words & tips to handle these exact scenarios with mean girls, all inside my members area, Assertive You or my How to Handle Grown Mean Girls Without Creating Drama Guide. Mean girl breadcrumb games work because they mess with your mind, dangling belonging, then pulling it away. But once you see the pattern, you can stop chasing crumbs and start demanding the full meal.

& Comment OUTFIT for links to what I’m wearing.

As for the 4 Breadcrumb Games Mean Girls Play to Make Sure You Know You Don’t Belong, they:

-Hint at inviting you to the next group plan or event but the invite never comes & you find out on social media that it’s already happened.
-Then they claim they “forgot” to invite you but notice how they didn’t forget anyone else. That’s not forgetfulness…
-When they do invite you, they “forget” to tell you key details like a dress code change, meeting spot, or inside joke so you show up unprepared…
-And They run hot and cold on purpose, just enough warmth to pull you back in, then ice you out to remind you you’re not one of them.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

#LTKNYFW #LTKShoeCrush #LTKStyleTip

Soccer mom outfit!

Wearing a tennis dress with lined shorts & a soccer mom sweater for my son’s soccer themed birthday party.

#LTKFindsUnder50 #LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKStyleTip

Soccer themed birthday party

We had a soccer coach come to teach a class, we did face painting, piñata, and had a soccer jewelry/dress up station. They styled 4-6 brackets on each arm.

#LTKFamily #LTKStyleTip #LTKKids

Fall outfit ideas.

Fall dresses, Amazon dresses, beige dress, denim dress.

Comment Assertive for phrases to use & tips to use to help you stop taking it personally when someone dislikes you or excludes you for no reason. All found inside my members area, Assertive You.

& Comment OUTFIT for links to what I’m wearing.

As for the 3 reasons why you trigger people:
-You did more with less. They can’t explain it, so they put you down.
-They see you as competition. So “good for her,” becomes, “why not me?” So they go quiet or turn cold.
-You show up happy & confident, just being yourself & suddenly the whispers or eye rolls start. You remind them of what they’re missing.

People aren’t really triggered by you. They’re triggered by what being around you brings up in them. It’s not really you. It’s what they feel when you walk in the room.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

#LTKStyleTip #LTKNYFW #LTKCon

Comment “Mean Girls” for exact words & tips to handle these situations, inside my members area, Assertive You or my How to Handle Grown Mean Girls Without Creating Drama Guide. This is the gaslighting game: they minimize, use excuses, and deflect until you’re left questioning yourself instead of their behavior.

& Comment OUTFIT for links to what I’m wearing.

As for the 4 Ways Mean Girls Gaslight You Into Thinking You’re the Problem:

They call you paranoid or say you’re overthinking things. It makes you doubt what’s right in front of you, until you stop trusting yourself.

They say you’re creating drama. You bring up what happened, and suddenly you’re the problem. That’s gaslighting, flipping your reality so speaking up feels wrong.

They hide behind excuses. “I was busy.” “I forgot.” “I thought you knew.” Convenient excuses that protect them from accountability.

They flip it into, “Well, what about when you…?” Now you’re defending yourself, and the real issue never gets addressed.

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Summer cover up, Labor Day outfit, polka dot outfit, polka dot set, amazon matching set, kaftan

Comment Mean Girl for exact words & tips to help you take back your power & stop Mean Girl Moms. It’s not just in your head or just you, Mean Girls grew up & they became moms. Find all inside my Grown Mean Girl or Mean Girls in School guides or my member’s only area, Assertive You.

And if you’ve ever dealt with a mean girl, share your story below so you can help others feel seen.

& if you’re here for outfit details, comment OUTFIT for links.

As for the 4 tactics Mean Girl Moms use to make sure you don’t feel welcome when school starts:

-They pretend not to see you when you walk by.
-& if they do say hi, they give a fake smile that never reaches their eyes (telling you exactly how they feel).
-They badmouth or gossip about you so much in front of their kids that their kids no longer want to play with yours.
-& they make inside jokes from last year in the new class group chat so newcomers feel left out and to remind everyone who runs the chat

About Christie, Dr. C: I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

#LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKFindsUnder50 #LTKStyleTip

Pre fall outfit, Amazon outfit, Amazon set, Amazon silk skirt, end of summer outfit, Labor Day outfit, country concert outfit

Comment Friend for tips & scripts to help you deepen connection & help you show up differently so you can start being put at the center of your friendships. You’re not too sensitive, it’s just that when your sensitivity is paired with over-giving, silencing yourself, or keeping your needs invisible, it makes you more likely to slip into the Fringe friend role. All are inside my new Fringe Friend No More Guide or my member’s only area, Assertive You.

And say “Hi” if you’re open to finding new friends, you never know who might reply!

If you’re here for outfit details, comment OUTFIT for details.

I’m a Johns Hopkins-trained clinical psychologist with a background in CBT, DBT, behavioral psychology, and motivational models. I blend evidence-based strategies with lived experience to help you handle mean girls, navigate parenting challenges, set real boundaries, make new friends, and stop shrinking in your friendships.

Xo,
Dr. C

#LTKStyleTip #LTKFindsUnder100 #LTKFindsUnder50